Play ball! Oh, and by the way, duck!!

Ever since the unspeakable events of Sunday, Feb. 3, we Boston sports fans have turned our lonely eyes to our beloved Red Sox.

It's been a long, cold winter. Thank God the boys are back.

But to all of you who are concocting phony reasons to sneak out of work and head over to Fenway, we here at Exhibit A have a word of warning: fans who fight over foul balls with the vigor of a fat guy going after the last nacho on the plate should do so at their own risk.

Because if you get hurt by a foul ball, don't bother suing the Red Sox. Someone already tried that — and failed.

On a September night in 1998, a woman named Jane Costa and three pals attended a Sox game at Fenway.

In the bottom of the fifth, Sox outfielder Darren Lewis (he of the banjo-like bat) worked the count to 1-2, then hit a line drive into the stands along the first-base line.

The ball hit Costa in the face, causing severe injuries.

Costa sued the Red Sox to recover money to help her with her injuries, and the case ended up in Massachusetts' Appeals Court.

But before I tell you about the case, let me share some interesting details that came up.

According to data supplied by the Red Sox, foul-ball injuries occur more often than you might think.

Five years of statistics during the 1990s show that the annual number of injuries spectators sustained as the result of foul balls ranged from 36 to 53, "with a substantial number requiring medical attention."

Scarier still is the fact that avoiding injury from a ball hit into the stands is sometimes close to impossible.

According to a professor of engineering who was hired by Costa to provide data for the case, she had virtually no time to react to the ball that was headed her way.

Costa's lawsuit was the first of its kind in more than 50 years to reach the Appeals Court.

And in the end, the Appeals Court found that Costa was not due one dime.

"We are persuaded that the potential for a foul ball to enter the stands and injure a spectator who is seated in an unscreened area is, as matter of law, sufficiently obvious that the [Red Sox] reasonably could conclude that a person of ordinary intelligence would perceive the risk and need no additional warning," the court decided.

Incidentally, Major League Baseball's Commissioner's Office offered a rather cold comment to the court on this case: "The timorous may always choose to stay home" (a rather condescending suggestion that fans should watch games on TV if they're not prepared for a line drive in the mouth).

A more "gracious approach," the Appeals Court said, would be for MLB to arrange a fund to compensate fans injured at games. But, said the court, that was not in the court's power in this case.

As far as I know, MLB has not taken any such steps.

So, go Sox, but when the ball is headed for your head … make sure to duck. {EXA}